Tuesday, July 31, 2007

Why Women Are Attracted to Jerks, And Does Self-Interest Negate Altruism?

This is a rather interesting post by Dr. Helen at Pajamas Media dealing first with why women are often attracted to bad men, and second how self-interest relates to most altruistic acts. Do we often deceive ourselves when we do and give to others? Think it's well worth a read.


Note to Commenters:

This post to a link is about two subjects: First, why women are attracted to jerks, and while we're at it, of the female as well as the male variety. And second, self-interest as it relates to altruisim?

That's it. You've gotten your licks in about Dick Cheney and Bill O'Neill. I got it. And my one or two readers got it too. I got it that you hate these men with a passion far beyond reason and you successfully have gotten this across in posts.

But I'm driving this here blog train and it's going to stay that way. We're not going off on a hundred different hateful tangents about whether Kos is a patriot or whether Dick Cheney has perjured himself in yet another ignominious way.

Stick to the topic if you want to get your comment published.

One more thing about commenters while I'm at it: No one will be banished from this blog, unless he assaults me, day in and day out with compulsive, hateful, multitudinous e-mails and comments-----that's only happened once.

So let me be clear once again, I don't believe any commenter is persona non grata, even if I don't like what you say, or worse yet, I don't care for you. While we all want to be universally loved and accepted, I won't hold it against you, if you don't like me or agree with everything I say and do. I hope my skin is a bit tougher.....but we shall see, won't we?

However, certain comments that I, the blog dame here, deem off topic, off color or off-the-wall won't always get published. Conversely, you are free to leave at any time, temporarily or for good, for good reason or no reason at all.

We all have First Amendment rights here. But it's still my blog....Na NA-NA NAHHHH NA!

Thanks for your interest and comments!


jenny said...

Why are women attracted to jerks like this?

Webutante said...

Maybe because they think he's right and that much of scientific opinion has been politicized.

I like men like that because they stand up for their beliefs, even when it's unpopular, stick by their guns and aren't swayed by public opinion.

Somehow in this country, we've gotten the impression that he who yells the loudest and the longest is the one who's the rightest.


Tom Blogical said...


What about jerks like this?

Or do you give him a pass because he, apparently, shares your political views?

Vienna VA said...

"Maybe because they think he's right and that much of scientific opinion has been politicized."

Web, that's gotta be one of the funniest things you've written in a while. If this administration is guilty of anything, it's politicizing EVERYTHING they touch. The scientific community has nothing on the Bush administration hacks who wouldn't know an honest fact about nature or the environment if it hit 'em upside the head.

Jenny, the VP is certainly not going to lift one finger to give Congress anything. He's part of the Executive branch, and as such, not beholden to either chamber of Congress. Oh, wait, no he's part of the Legislative Branch as President of the Senate, and has previously said that Execuive Orders relating to the Executive Branch do not include his office. But his WH office and staff (all names TS/SCI) are funded through the Executive Branch, and he has recently admitted to being a part of the Executive Branch for exactly 2 hours and 5 minutes while Pres. Bush was getting his colonoscopy. He's described himself as an "unusual creature" (putting it very, very mildly), and I can only guess he's back in that netherworld of floating between two of the three branches of government answering to no one. Talk about someone who needs some checks and balances...

jenny said...

we've gotten the impression that he who yells the loudest and the longest is the one who's the rightest.

Web, you must be talking about Bill O'Reilly who just been dumped by advertisers Lowes and Home Depot because of his hate filled attacks.

Read about it here and watch a funny video on Fox's promotion of the Republican War on Science.

Web said...

Ladies, ladies,

First and foremost, our vice-president and several of Bush's inner circle are being asked for materials that no, NO, White House has ever been asked for or surrendered before. Whether this is lawful or reasonable, which I think it's not, will be for the courts to decide.

And as for the Bill O'Reilly thing, I can't speak to that since I know so little. I know the great defenders of our freedoms over at Kos and MoveOnOverLeft.org have been in a little hatefest with O'Reilly who noboody seems to like, because nobody on the left can compete with him. At least from what I've seen and read.

Two grown-up ideas to contemplate:

First, just because somebody demands something and you refuse, it doesn't mean the refuser is guilty of wrong doing.

Second, our First Amendment freedoms are both to speak our minds and to refuse to listen or support those people whom we choose, for good reason or no reason at all.

Now hear this: I defend the right of Home Depot or anyone to pull advertising from Bill's show, but that says nothing about anything. It especially does not indite O'Reilly. For all I know, it could be that HD has buckled to some external or internal pressure.

It probably says more about HD than O'Reilly. Either way, I can't get too wigged out about it.

Best wishes.

Jungle Mom said...

Web, well this was interesting. You have fan club here, huh? Love your sense of humor!

Vienna VA said...

Web. I don't hate Dick Cheney. I think he's a lousy VP, but I have no hatred towards him or anyone else. I'm very much a happy go lucky person in my real life, and try to make it a point never to hate anyone.

I mentioned the info about Kos because you flippantly referred to him as a "defender of freedom". I thought it might be interesting to point out that he actually is one.

I don't have any comments on falling for jerks. My husband is an all-around great guy, terrific father, my complete and total soul mate. We've been together 12 wonderful years. I consider myself very lucky.

And hey, don't be down on your readership. By my count, you've probably got at least two dozen or so loyal readers.

Web said...

Jungle Mom, Yeah, just another day in paradise! And I actually mean that. So glad you came by.

Vienna, I appreciate your coment and am happy that you have such a good man in your life and have a happy life. That is indeed a great blessing.

Vienna VA said...

Believe me, I know. One of my closest friends is trapped (and I don't use that term lightly) in a very difficult, depressing, verbally abusive relationship. It's hard to see someone I care about treated so badly. The thing that's the worst about it is that she knows it's damaging to her self-esteem to stay, and it's setting a terrible example of what a marriage is to her young children. Divorce is not an option for religious reasons (she's an evangelical).

It makes me appreciate the relationship I have with my husband, truly an Officer and a Gentleman.

Web said...

Hang on to your man, Vienna!

I am certainly no authority, however, in the case of extreme maritial abuse, I would say your friend at the very least, needs to get help. There are some great counsellors down the road from you at McLean Bible Church.

As a Christian woman, I am not of the conviction that a woman stays in a horrendous situation of abuse at all costs. Divorce and separation, while they should never be entered into lightly, should be options in certain extreme cases. But getting good help from someone you feel is wise and mature can and should be undertaken.

This is certainly on topic and I hope you can be an encouragement to her.

Vienna VA said...

I try to be a good friend, a shoulder to lean (or cry) on. I'm not sure what church she is attending now; I know that her faith has been, and continues to be, a great comfort for her.

Personally, I don't think that God or anyone else will look askance at her for divorcing her husband. She doesn't agree, and although she occassionaly entertains the thought of at least a separation, she quickly comes to the conclusion that divorce is out of the question. So the cycle continues, and she goes through periods of depression followed by some degree of happiness. Hard to see a friend living that way.

Web said...

Vienna, your friend is very fortunate to have you to support and encourage her. Know it's not easy to watch. I hope also she will pray about this situation and then listen to the guidance that God gives her on a daily basis.